100 best first lines from novels ›
1. Call me Ishmael. - Herman Melville, Moby-Dick (1851)
2. It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife. - Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice (1813)
3. A screaming comes across the sky. - Thomas Pynchon, Gravity’s Rainbow (1973)
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#books
#best first lines
today, one of my girls was suffering because she just couldn’t wrap her mind around the idea that she had to make a penis out of modeling clay for her science project. “oh, hun, is that supposed to be a penis?” i asked. the only response i got was an embarrassed look and a barely audible “yes”. “it looks more like a chunk of paté.” so i proceeded to roll the clay in my hands to make it cylindrical, as she blushed even more. i shaped the clay the best i could as fast as i could and gave it to her. She stared at the thing still quite embarrassed. “Well, ain’t that a lovely penis?” At that point everybody was giggling, and so was she. Then another one of my kids came and took the penis, so i asked “hey, is that your penis?” “No” he said. “Then leave it alone, we don’t go around taking other people’s penises in this classroom.” To which everyone simply bursted out laughing. Yup, some days teaching is just that fun. =)
projects should be finished tomorrow, so i’m taking pictures. uh yeah, some lovely internal organs and reproductive systems on your dashboards coming soon.
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#penis
#so cute
#my girls
" If you've never stared off in the distance, then your life is a shame and though I'll never forget your face, sometimes i can't remember my name." Counting Crows
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